Episode No. 12
“I've Got A Little Song Here”Monkee madness begins when Michael is conned out of
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Production No. 4707
Final Draft: June 14, 1966
Filmed At: Screen Gems Studios, Hollywood, CA.
Filming Dates: August 1-5, 1966
Original Air Date: November 28, 1966
Ratings: 18.8 rating/30.1 share (10,320,000 viewers)
© Raybert Productions; 11-28-66; LP37615
Sponsor This Week: Slicker and Black Label by Yardley Of London™
Rerun Dates: June 26, 1967 (NBC); March 7, 1970, November 6, 1971 (CBS);February 24, 1973 (ABC) Written by Treva Silverman.
Directed by Bruce Kessler.
Produced by Robert Rafelson and Bert Schneider.
Associate Producer: Ward Sylvester.
Music Supervision: Don Kirshner.
Background Music Composed and Conducted by Stu Phillips.
“Gonna Buy Me A Dog” Written & Produced by Tommy Boyce & Bobby Hart.
“Mary, Mary” Written & Produced by Michael Nesmith.
Guest cast:
Bernie............................................................................Phil Leeds Producer.................................................................Irwin Charone Harry...........................................................................Joseph Mell Old Man...............................................................Owen McGiveny Watchman.................................................................Buddy Lewis Hilda.............................................................................Mary Foran Postman.................................................................Bobby Johnson Director...................................................................Larry Gelman Leigh Chapman as Joanie
Home Video Releases:
- The Monkees: The Collector's Edition - VHS Tape #15 (Columbia House #1????, May 22, 1995)
- The Monkees Deluxe Limited Edition Boxed Set - VHS Tape #15 (Rhino R3 2960, October 17, 1995)
- The Monkees - Season 1 DVD Boxed Set - Disc 2 (Rhino RetroVision DVD R2 976076, May 13, 2003).
Synopsis:
At The Monkees’ pad, Michael receives mail from the postman: one a sub-booklet for Peter about a body building school, another is a letter for Michael from The High Class Music Publishing Company whom offer him a chance to write a song and get rich and he decides to show them a song he’s written: “Gonna Buy Me A Dog” (actually a Boyce-Hart tune!) Mockingly, Micky and Davy do a fantasy sequence as vaudevillians with David on piano and Micky naming their latest songs. However, Michael is convinced songwriting is a business worth millions; as he answers the door again, the postman returns to inform Michael there’s $.06 due on his letter.
Later that day, Michael arrives at The High Class Music Publishing Co. (which also does Greeting Cards, Storm Windows, Reconditioned Vacuum Cleaners, Magazine Subscriptions, and Door Lettering!). Once there, he greets another aspiring songwriter: a little old man who wrote “My Funny Valentine” (never mind there’s a song has already been written with that title!). Then Michael goes in the office of Bernie's Class and submits the lyrics of his song. Bernie, who is terribly unable to pronounce Michael's last name, praises it and tells him of his plans to sell the song to Joanie Janz, the hottest singer in show business, who’ll use the song in her latest movie in exchange for $100 for legal fees and incidentals. Michael is so excited about this that he uses the telephone booth to call up Micky, his mother, and Mr. (Tim?) Conway, whom he met on a bus five years ago. Back at home, The Monkees, excited about Michael’s impending success, imagine a sequence set to “Gonna Buy Me A Dog” featuring them traipsing all over a park with (what else?) a pack of dogs. Having pawned his guitar for only $99.95, Michael pays the amount to Bernie and questions him again about his plans regarding his song. To prove it, Bernie personally phones Janz, but only pretends to do so in order to dupe Michael, inadvertently calling a middle-age couple Harry and Hilda instead.
Sure he's on his way to fame and fortune, Michael then tells the guys of his big break on the phone but Micky tells David and Peter that he may be the victim of a con man. Not knowing what else to do they decide that this is a job for Monkeemen and change into superheroes. All but Peter fly away; leaving him to walk instead. While disguising themselves as piano tuners, the guys go into Bernie’s office to spy on him. They spy on Bernie speaking into a dictophone telling to put a letter he wrote to Michael “praising” his song into mimeo and have 500 copies printed. This convinces them well beyond a doubt’s shadow that he is a swindler, and they attempt to warn him. Meanwhile, Michael takes his song to the soundstage where Joanie Janz is making The Wolf Girl Meets The Vampire In The Old West, but becomes dejected when Joanie tells him she never heard of him or his song!
Back at the pad, a depressed Michael, oblivious to such a rejection but refusing to believe he was conned, sadly hides in his room on his bed, resisting every attempt his mates make to cheer him up. Then the others come up with an idea to help Michael so Micky calls up Bernie claiming to be a big shot movie mogul M.D. asking to meet him at the studio. At the studio, there, Micky, David and Peter – as M.D. and his yes men, respectively -- park The Monkeemobile in Dean Martin's spot and brashly proceed to take things over, convincing everyone including the director and producer that Micky’s a big shot. When Bernie arrives, he finds the producer and his camera personnel fawning over “M.D.” and his pals. “M.D.” tells him about his new movie starring Joanie Janz, Gregory Peck, Elizabeth Taylor, Doris Day and Sonny Tufts (his first low-budget picture!), and that he wants a song whose title must include a dog, because Joanie will be portraying the part of an animal lover. The sham has Bernie fooled as he suggests Michael's tune, “Gonna Buy Me A Dog,,” and, within 8 minutes, he gets him over to the studio, but Michael asks for $200 in order to place the song under exclusive contract. Bernie only produces $199, but Michael takes it anyway, and the four Monkees laugh at having turned the tables on the swindler. A song sequence set to “Mary, Mary” ensues, with the boys gallivanting around a soundstage as they chase Peter about.
Later, Michael shares his money with his fellow victim, the old man, since they’ve both been swindled and the old man tells Michael about his new song he plans on writing called “I Want To Buy Me A Dog”. As Michael, Micky and David prepares to leave, they find Peter missing; they look up in the sky and discover Peter, garbed in super heroic Monkeeman gear, now finally able to fly through the air.
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